Our informal lessons went on more frequently, From the second day, she had a veil of studies on her head. Meanwhile, on my head, there was blindness. Every day we had tons of lessons to talk about, as if we were creating an encyclopedia of our own. With days, we came closer and closer, and there was a day when vacuum filled ours space between. With was after hours of discussion, I tapped her with my hand while laughing. She crossed my hand over my shoulder. We both leaned on the wall. She was making silly faces trying to get me to burst out in laughter. We could feel that the silence would take over our discussions sooner or later.
Then it hit me. It suddenly crossed my mind and I asked her, ‘In a situation I am going to place in front of you, answer my question, okay’. I tried to say it seriously, but I can’t stop grinning. Then I asked: ‘If we were roughly the same age, and we were to found our soulmates, would you be okay if I asked you out?’. Then her answer came right away: ‘See, I don’t really think much, and to be honest, I keep emotions locked in a box’, she looked very serious. After her answer, I was a bit disappointed. Good thing our laughing streak continued right away.
Ten weeks had passed now, I was out of my zone. Her image in me took over, up to the point of my guilt, so I could not feel that as well. She didn’t show up in the class. The next day gave me the same results. The third day of absence took away pinches of hope. Then finally, she emerged. But is seems like she didn’t even notice me. I was missing her badly. Soon I turned into a mere observant rather than what others would call a friend, she was neutral in her face with blank expressions, no manipulations, not one bit.
Then the day arrived where I was taught a very important lesson. She called me up and asked how I was doing, as if nothing happened. ‘How are you reacting to the situation, can’t you understand the question?’, I said it with a hint of annoyance. She then asked me to meet her after class. Then I thought she had this day reserved just for me.
After Class: She kept her hand on my shoulder while we were walking while telling me ‘I am going home soon. And I’m going to marry’. After a strong resistance and ignorance, I tried to get a grasp of the situation. I tried to accept it. I was only a matter of minutes until I got myself together and started smiling. ‘You should not feel bad’, said She while expecting the opposite. Then she followed it up with ‘meet me tomorrow and I have something to tell you’.
She never showed up.